Modesty is not a black and white issue
Modest dress is a key component of Islam, but it's important to retain personality and aesthetics in the way we dress
This week I tried out the most extreme black cloak to make it into my wardrobe. A piece of elastic attached it to the top of my head, and then the single piece of long fabric hung snugly over my hair, sweeping over my shoulders and down past my feet. The final flourish was for me to hold together the two edges under my chin. Two eyes, a nose and a squashed mouth peeked through the gap under the black sheet. My husband peered into the bedroom, and nearly dropped his mug of tea.
"You look like a black blob," he said, horrified. "Where have you gone?" He poked underneath the black cloth like a serious Sherlock Holmes. Despite feeling uncomfortable about the cloak, no man was going to tell me how to observe modest dress. "Don't you want me to hide my figure so I'm not attracting attention?" I barked at him. He froze, rabbit in headlights, and then looked at me for a clue.
"Of course I want you to be modest," he said, certain that this was the right answer.
"And isn’t this long cloak, the most modest thing I could wear?"
"Well yes. Erm, well no, well yes, no, yes, yeah... no? yes, yes... "
I looked at him sternly, with the if-you-dare glint of a determined Muslim woman, who has pro-actively chosen to wear the headscarf and modest dress. He looked more terrified of me in my new guise of crazy-eyed Muslim harridan than he had of the black blob. But he was right to be distressed.
The question about how we should define modesty is constantly plaguing the Muslim community. Neither men nor women can map out any consistency or meaning in the higgledy-piggledy implementation of the rules of modest behaviour. At work you can interact with the opposite gender but not at Islamic conferences. Muslim men can shake hands with non-Muslim women, but not vice-versa. Brides who normally wear hijab will uncover in front of men to be shown off. In some communities, men will push into the women's section during weddings, but will enforce segregation at home. In others it is the opposite, with women not allowed to participate in mosque management due to the fitnah (division) this could cause, but happily socialising together.
The spirit and implementation of modesty is confused at best. Women and their clothing have become hijacked into being the symbol of how religious we are as a community. If women are properly covered, then everyone seems to think they can rest easy.
Her choice of dress is inextricably linked to a judgement about her spiritual status. At the sober end she is considered overly pious, not to mention excruciatingly dull. By contrast those women who choose not to wear a headscarf, are immediately judged to be irreligious, un-spiritual and not considered to be 'properly' practising. There has been a visible increase in the number of women wearing the hijab (head covering), the jilbab (loose fitting long dress) as well as the niqab (face covering).
Colours are subtle: greys, browns, blues, blacks. These women cite their dress as a freedom, an escape from the body-obsessed post-modern world, as well as a greater commitment to the values of Islam. At the other extreme is the rise of the Muhajababe. Her head covered, she probably wears skinny fit jeans and lycra t-shirts. For her, the headscarf itself has shown her commitment to her Muslim identity and faith.
We sighed simultaneously at the black cloak I was still wearing. "We all end up looking the same, I feel anonymous and unknown. I'm not me anymore," I mourned to him. "Some people say that our voices should not be heard either. I'm part of a black silent mass at the back of the room. Surely individuality is important? Especially if Allah says that there are as many ways to know Him as there are human beings?"
He responded enigmatically: "Each flower that God has created is specifically a different colour, and design. Even when they are closed, they make an effort to show their personality, and individuality."
I squinted dubiously at him. "Does this mean you think women don't need to wear niqab, jilbab or even the hijab?"
"Defining what 'modesty' means isn't easy, and we Muslims spend an awful lot of time on the outward signs like dress and physical separation. Where we need to focus more is on the complex relationships between modesty, personality and aesthetics."
I draped the abaya playfully over his shoulders. "Modesty isn't just for Muslim women to worry about," I reminded him. "To build a strong community we all have to be concerned with inner spirituality as well as outer codes of conduct like dress." Grinning cheesily, I pointed at the cloak: "Modesty is definitely not a black and white issue."
This article was published in The Muslim News
This week I tried out the most extreme black cloak to make it into my wardrobe. A piece of elastic attached it to the top of my head, and then the single piece of long fabric hung snugly over my hair, sweeping over my shoulders and down past my feet. The final flourish was for me to hold together the two edges under my chin. Two eyes, a nose and a squashed mouth peeked through the gap under the black sheet. My husband peered into the bedroom, and nearly dropped his mug of tea.
"You look like a black blob," he said, horrified. "Where have you gone?" He poked underneath the black cloth like a serious Sherlock Holmes. Despite feeling uncomfortable about the cloak, no man was going to tell me how to observe modest dress. "Don't you want me to hide my figure so I'm not attracting attention?" I barked at him. He froze, rabbit in headlights, and then looked at me for a clue.
"Of course I want you to be modest," he said, certain that this was the right answer.
"And isn’t this long cloak, the most modest thing I could wear?"
"Well yes. Erm, well no, well yes, no, yes, yeah... no? yes, yes... "
I looked at him sternly, with the if-you-dare glint of a determined Muslim woman, who has pro-actively chosen to wear the headscarf and modest dress. He looked more terrified of me in my new guise of crazy-eyed Muslim harridan than he had of the black blob. But he was right to be distressed.
The question about how we should define modesty is constantly plaguing the Muslim community. Neither men nor women can map out any consistency or meaning in the higgledy-piggledy implementation of the rules of modest behaviour. At work you can interact with the opposite gender but not at Islamic conferences. Muslim men can shake hands with non-Muslim women, but not vice-versa. Brides who normally wear hijab will uncover in front of men to be shown off. In some communities, men will push into the women's section during weddings, but will enforce segregation at home. In others it is the opposite, with women not allowed to participate in mosque management due to the fitnah (division) this could cause, but happily socialising together.
The spirit and implementation of modesty is confused at best. Women and their clothing have become hijacked into being the symbol of how religious we are as a community. If women are properly covered, then everyone seems to think they can rest easy.
Her choice of dress is inextricably linked to a judgement about her spiritual status. At the sober end she is considered overly pious, not to mention excruciatingly dull. By contrast those women who choose not to wear a headscarf, are immediately judged to be irreligious, un-spiritual and not considered to be 'properly' practising. There has been a visible increase in the number of women wearing the hijab (head covering), the jilbab (loose fitting long dress) as well as the niqab (face covering).
Colours are subtle: greys, browns, blues, blacks. These women cite their dress as a freedom, an escape from the body-obsessed post-modern world, as well as a greater commitment to the values of Islam. At the other extreme is the rise of the Muhajababe. Her head covered, she probably wears skinny fit jeans and lycra t-shirts. For her, the headscarf itself has shown her commitment to her Muslim identity and faith.
We sighed simultaneously at the black cloak I was still wearing. "We all end up looking the same, I feel anonymous and unknown. I'm not me anymore," I mourned to him. "Some people say that our voices should not be heard either. I'm part of a black silent mass at the back of the room. Surely individuality is important? Especially if Allah says that there are as many ways to know Him as there are human beings?"
He responded enigmatically: "Each flower that God has created is specifically a different colour, and design. Even when they are closed, they make an effort to show their personality, and individuality."
I squinted dubiously at him. "Does this mean you think women don't need to wear niqab, jilbab or even the hijab?"
"Defining what 'modesty' means isn't easy, and we Muslims spend an awful lot of time on the outward signs like dress and physical separation. Where we need to focus more is on the complex relationships between modesty, personality and aesthetics."
I draped the abaya playfully over his shoulders. "Modesty isn't just for Muslim women to worry about," I reminded him. "To build a strong community we all have to be concerned with inner spirituality as well as outer codes of conduct like dress." Grinning cheesily, I pointed at the cloak: "Modesty is definitely not a black and white issue."
This article was published in The Muslim News
Labels: culture, faith, Hijab, Muslim, Muslim News, Muslim Veil, Muslim women, Muslims, Niqab, niqab muslim, religion, Veil, women
posted by Shelina Zahra Janmohamed at 14:16
9 Comments:
Salaam Shelina,
I'm watching today's episode of Minbar on PressTV in which you are a guest. You are a very eloquent speaker and raise a lot of very important issues. It's great to see people like you making your voice heard. I hope you continue, and may Allah grant you tawfiq.
I'm also curious to hear about your experience with PressTV. What is your impression of the news station?
wa salaam
Shelina,
I've been reading your last couple posts on modesty. Important and controversial issues, no doubt about it.
These are a couple things that came to mind as I read your posts. Yes it's true that there are definitely dimensions to modesty that can not be objectified. No doubt about it. This is why there is even a phenomenon that you can name "muhajababe," and likewise pretty much no outward sign of piety can be used as a reliable basis for a judgement about a person's inner state. I think the latter insight is one that's been emphasized a great deal by the arifs and sufis of the past. Having said that though, I think its important to distinguish between those objective and also non-objective aspects of modesty legislated and recommended by Islam itself and the appropriateness of the judgments allegedly made based on those requirements of Islam.
You raise the question, can you dress provocatively and be religious? This question strikes me as being either completely ambiguous or trivial. Ambiguous because the discussion we are having demands that we first define religious. Does being religious mean that one fulfill all the demands of fiqh? In that case the answer would be no. Does being religious mean that we manifest Islam completely, both inwardly and outwardly? In that case the answer would be no, but almost no one would fit the bill. Does being religious mean having a reputation of religiosity in the eyes of others? Well, in that case it depends on who you ask, though the probable answer would be no. And finally if we define religious as being someone who aspires to the ideals of religiosity despite perhaps falling short of those ideals, then the answer would be a yes. If this last answer is at all surprising then it should only highlight the assumption that many have that provacatively dressed people do not aspire to religious ideals. There is nothing that would logically exclude the provocatively dressed from the category of religious anymore than it would people who commit other sins.
It seems that the answer to the question you pose lies in the understanding one has of the question itself, and in that sense, becomes trivial. This is in no way to imply that the discussion that follows your question is trivial. You raise very important concerns that plague Muslim communities everywhere and should be openly discussed.
hope u are well.
wa salaam,
Your analysis is very interesting - both in how you break down the question, but also in itself - that you are exposing the need to unravel the assumptions that we build into words of great meaning like 'religious'. Thank you!
I think the interesting point you picked up on was that we do not allow those who 'aspire' to be religious the benefit of the doubt, or the space to explore their feelings, and here I think many people let their compatriots down - by closing the door to exploration and change. We can't believe that someone can truly change.
I should point out that the question of 'can you be religious and dress provocatively' was asked by the BBC Asian network, rather than me, i was simply commenting on the debate that I had been part of.
I should have known. The question sounded too much like a sound byte for you to have posed it.
Random question...are you by any chance related to the Janmohamed family in Sacramento, California? They are wonderful people and I can't help but make the connection both from your names and intellects.
wa salaam
'Fraid they are no relation of mine...
Shelina,
I am intrigued by your posts, and while I've yet to read through them in detail, I'm taking the chance while I have it to congrtulate you for raising a crucial question thats often taken for granted in our community.
Its also a question that has multiple dimentions. On one side, why do we see the need for such outward piety in clothing.
But another side of the same coin is why are we so condemnatory towards others who lack this (within our community, but also outwardly). Specifically, in other cultures where nudity is more accepted, we are very quick to condemn this is foul/non-religious.
While this may be the case, I certainly feel otherse deserve more than a cursory glance at what they wear.
Anyway. These are questions. Thank you for some insightful reading.
I coudln't find your email...
see my blog post, "Hijab and Muffin Tops". Ruminations on Muslim modesty by an American Jewish guy.
http://theautoprophet.blogspot.com/2008/07/hijab-and-muffin-top.html
Interesting article, autoprophet. I'll be really interested to see the response you get. It certainly isn't fashionable or acceptable for a Muslim woman to make the points you did about being seen as a person rather than a midriff, but let's see what happpens when it comes to someone like you...
really liked your articles. I had just found your blog actually, being new to blogging and blog-hopping.
But yes, modesty is hard to define. In my own opinion, perhaps its definition really depends on where you are, and how your society views women and Islam in general. we do not want to feel too alienated from the society, nor do we want to make Allah mad, so just have to try the in-betweens, maybe. As long as the hijab is at accordance to what Allah had said in the Quran...
i'll drop by and read more of your posts, insyaAllah..
btw, feel free to drop by to my blog and comment. i'm just a beginner, still crawling along.
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