Five Things I Love About Being a British Muslim Woman
Who would have thought that there could be plenty to love about being a British Muslim Woman? ...
The media is smitten with bringing us bad news. It creates villains and demons and tells us the worst about humanity. And it does this in particular when it comes to Muslims, and oh-so-extra-specially when it is about Muslim women.
"Poor, oppressed, miserable, battered Muslim women!" cry the media harpies. They take lustful pleasure in oppression of their own kind, by misrepresenting us, by stifling our voices, by denying us our identities. "It cannot be that you love being Muslim!" say the politico-journo-lobbyist voices. "You must not partake of Britain and its values," say the Muslim voices that also try to own us. In true British style I say to all these voices, two fingers! I follow this embarrassing slip of emotion by a further display of British Muslim style which means I blush at the brazenness of that gesture.
I'm here to set the record straight. I like being a British Muslim Woman. In fact, I love it. Ol' Blighty is the place of my birth, and I am very much a child of the empire, my origins being in the far flung reaches of the reign on which the sun never set. Like all good British Muslim women, I love a good gossip, and a good moan. I am careful not to talk to people on the underground (except in a crisis). I talk about the whether and traffic in immense detail. I love fish and chips, with lots of vinegar. I am love-struck with the Britishness that venerates Stonehenge, despite its toy-sized pebbles when compared to the great wonders of the ancient world. I am besotted by the fact that we haven't won the world cup for forty years, and yet we are adamant that we will certainly win the next time we play. Hurrah for being a British Muslim Woman!
I can make the world a better place
Prophet Abraham was thrown onto a large fire when he challenged the establishment. Miraculously the fire didn't burn him. He was, quite literally, cool about it. Nor was his ardour to pursue the truth diminished. This Islamic parable of the fire makes me aspire to be a British Muslim woman Abraham. I too want to be a good citizen in the best of British and Muslim traditions. I too want to gather the courage to challenge what is wrong with the status quo. Despite the enormity of Abraham's fire, little ants ferried drops of water in their mouths to try and put out the blaze. They didn't expect to solve the crisis alone, but they wanted to do their bit. I desire to be a British Muslim woman who can also do her bit, who can make a contribution to the society I live in.
Despite my disagreements with the political views of the government, I am enamoured of the fact that I can protest about their loathsome views. I won't get arrested for lobbying, demonstrating, writing about my views or speaking out. Whether we Brits always live up to our values of fair play and justice is one thing, but I'm proud that as a nation we at least aspire to them.
The very best of British however, is being able to challenge stereotypes and having the opportunity to make Britain a better place. When Britain closes its eyes and its heart as it seems to be doing in understanding the issues of Muslims and of women, it is a disappointing and dark place to be. But Being British means I have hope that we can make this a great nation. Being in a country where I can have the good fight, and be proud that I am doing my duty as a citizen is why I love being here.
Pink hijabs are a fashion possibility...
... as are green ones, black ones, yellow ones or even Union Jack hijabs. As a Muslim woman living in Britain, I am joyful that I have choice to dress modestly, and that I can exercise that choice. I like the fact that hijab is a word that transcends into British culture. I am quietly proud to have a faith which is constructed around respecting my personality and my individuality rather than my vital statistics. It gives me pleasure to say that I have not replaced the corsets of yore, with the breast enhancements and liposuction of today.
My personality harbours a desire (like most women) to express myself through what I wear. I don't want to dress anonymously in black or grey. I like it that Britain is a place that gives me the space and creativity to express myself aesthetically.
Being superhuman is a choice, not an obligation
I admit that I'd like to have it all - career, family, fashion, fitness, domestic utopia and corporate success. I want to be perfectly attired, cook food that puts Delia to shame, and burn the dragons in their own den. The reality of being a woman means I'm likely to suffer discrimination in the workplace, be paid less than my male counterparts, and bear the weight of domestic duties and childcare.
Being Muslim gives me a new perspective - I can choose to have it all, but I don't have to have it all in order to be validated. But I retain the choice to try everything. My loyalties to the sisterhood, both Muslim and in wider society, mean that I share the pressures, pains and desires, and I too want to make life for women better. I too want to make society a more equitable place.
Diversity is a celebration of more than just food
Chicken Tikka Masala is the national dish now, and stir-fry noodles and hummus are not far behind. As a nation we love sampling food from other cultures and incorporating them into our cuisine. But diversity encompasses more than that. Multiculturalism celebrates cultures and respects them by understanding the equal value they offer. I am smitten with the principles of diversity that Britain has been trying to uphold, and have felt that sinking feeling with recent talk about belittling other cultures.
As a Muslim I support the principles of diversity, being expressed in the Qur'an with the words that "All human beings were created as tribes and nations so that you may know one another." Trying to live by the principle that we should respect others for who they are, not where they come from or what they look like stems from all parts of my British Muslim woman's identity. We don't always hit the bullseye with our policies, but at least we know where we are aiming.
My faith and my country push me to be a better person
I'm constantly challenged by my faith to improve. External standards do that - they pull you up and make you face the depths of your weaknesses. Religion is about thinking of others, fighting your childlike tantrums and greed to be free and happy in spirit, and to make those around us live better lives too. That's what our beloved "Land of Hope and Glory" does as well. In case you've forgotten the lyrics of this erstwhile national anthem, it refers to the nation as "Mother of the Free", an acknowledgement to us lovely ladies that keep the nation going, if ever I heard one. "Truth and Right and Freedom, each a holy gem," proclaims the song further. Such words are rousing to the heart, and if we dig deep into the essence of Britain, and what it truly means to be British, we will push ourselves to regain these values and make ourselves better people.
I can be sure that there will be people who feel sorry for the delusions they will claim I suffer from being proud to be a Muslim woman. And I am even more certain that there are those who will tell me that it is shameful for me to be proud of being British. "How can you be proud of a country that attacks the Muslim nations and kills innocent Muslims," they will reproach me ardently.
The following I say to all of you. All human societies have their strengths as well as their failings, whether they be Muslim societies or otherwise. It is my duty as a British citizen, and it is my responsibility as a Muslim woman to try and make the place I live in a better place. If I can practice my faith as I have understood it, if I can contribute to society and try to improve it, if I can express myself in that society so that I can be who I am and pursue my dreams, then that is a society that I can be proud of. My society may not be perfect, but I will support its aspiration to be a better place.
The media is smitten with bringing us bad news. It creates villains and demons and tells us the worst about humanity. And it does this in particular when it comes to Muslims, and oh-so-extra-specially when it is about Muslim women.
"Poor, oppressed, miserable, battered Muslim women!" cry the media harpies. They take lustful pleasure in oppression of their own kind, by misrepresenting us, by stifling our voices, by denying us our identities. "It cannot be that you love being Muslim!" say the politico-journo-lobbyist voices. "You must not partake of Britain and its values," say the Muslim voices that also try to own us. In true British style I say to all these voices, two fingers! I follow this embarrassing slip of emotion by a further display of British Muslim style which means I blush at the brazenness of that gesture.
I'm here to set the record straight. I like being a British Muslim Woman. In fact, I love it. Ol' Blighty is the place of my birth, and I am very much a child of the empire, my origins being in the far flung reaches of the reign on which the sun never set. Like all good British Muslim women, I love a good gossip, and a good moan. I am careful not to talk to people on the underground (except in a crisis). I talk about the whether and traffic in immense detail. I love fish and chips, with lots of vinegar. I am love-struck with the Britishness that venerates Stonehenge, despite its toy-sized pebbles when compared to the great wonders of the ancient world. I am besotted by the fact that we haven't won the world cup for forty years, and yet we are adamant that we will certainly win the next time we play. Hurrah for being a British Muslim Woman!
I can make the world a better place
Prophet Abraham was thrown onto a large fire when he challenged the establishment. Miraculously the fire didn't burn him. He was, quite literally, cool about it. Nor was his ardour to pursue the truth diminished. This Islamic parable of the fire makes me aspire to be a British Muslim woman Abraham. I too want to be a good citizen in the best of British and Muslim traditions. I too want to gather the courage to challenge what is wrong with the status quo. Despite the enormity of Abraham's fire, little ants ferried drops of water in their mouths to try and put out the blaze. They didn't expect to solve the crisis alone, but they wanted to do their bit. I desire to be a British Muslim woman who can also do her bit, who can make a contribution to the society I live in.
Despite my disagreements with the political views of the government, I am enamoured of the fact that I can protest about their loathsome views. I won't get arrested for lobbying, demonstrating, writing about my views or speaking out. Whether we Brits always live up to our values of fair play and justice is one thing, but I'm proud that as a nation we at least aspire to them.
The very best of British however, is being able to challenge stereotypes and having the opportunity to make Britain a better place. When Britain closes its eyes and its heart as it seems to be doing in understanding the issues of Muslims and of women, it is a disappointing and dark place to be. But Being British means I have hope that we can make this a great nation. Being in a country where I can have the good fight, and be proud that I am doing my duty as a citizen is why I love being here.
Pink hijabs are a fashion possibility...
... as are green ones, black ones, yellow ones or even Union Jack hijabs. As a Muslim woman living in Britain, I am joyful that I have choice to dress modestly, and that I can exercise that choice. I like the fact that hijab is a word that transcends into British culture. I am quietly proud to have a faith which is constructed around respecting my personality and my individuality rather than my vital statistics. It gives me pleasure to say that I have not replaced the corsets of yore, with the breast enhancements and liposuction of today.
My personality harbours a desire (like most women) to express myself through what I wear. I don't want to dress anonymously in black or grey. I like it that Britain is a place that gives me the space and creativity to express myself aesthetically.
Being superhuman is a choice, not an obligation
I admit that I'd like to have it all - career, family, fashion, fitness, domestic utopia and corporate success. I want to be perfectly attired, cook food that puts Delia to shame, and burn the dragons in their own den. The reality of being a woman means I'm likely to suffer discrimination in the workplace, be paid less than my male counterparts, and bear the weight of domestic duties and childcare.
Being Muslim gives me a new perspective - I can choose to have it all, but I don't have to have it all in order to be validated. But I retain the choice to try everything. My loyalties to the sisterhood, both Muslim and in wider society, mean that I share the pressures, pains and desires, and I too want to make life for women better. I too want to make society a more equitable place.
Diversity is a celebration of more than just food
Chicken Tikka Masala is the national dish now, and stir-fry noodles and hummus are not far behind. As a nation we love sampling food from other cultures and incorporating them into our cuisine. But diversity encompasses more than that. Multiculturalism celebrates cultures and respects them by understanding the equal value they offer. I am smitten with the principles of diversity that Britain has been trying to uphold, and have felt that sinking feeling with recent talk about belittling other cultures.
As a Muslim I support the principles of diversity, being expressed in the Qur'an with the words that "All human beings were created as tribes and nations so that you may know one another." Trying to live by the principle that we should respect others for who they are, not where they come from or what they look like stems from all parts of my British Muslim woman's identity. We don't always hit the bullseye with our policies, but at least we know where we are aiming.
My faith and my country push me to be a better person
I'm constantly challenged by my faith to improve. External standards do that - they pull you up and make you face the depths of your weaknesses. Religion is about thinking of others, fighting your childlike tantrums and greed to be free and happy in spirit, and to make those around us live better lives too. That's what our beloved "Land of Hope and Glory" does as well. In case you've forgotten the lyrics of this erstwhile national anthem, it refers to the nation as "Mother of the Free", an acknowledgement to us lovely ladies that keep the nation going, if ever I heard one. "Truth and Right and Freedom, each a holy gem," proclaims the song further. Such words are rousing to the heart, and if we dig deep into the essence of Britain, and what it truly means to be British, we will push ourselves to regain these values and make ourselves better people.
I can be sure that there will be people who feel sorry for the delusions they will claim I suffer from being proud to be a Muslim woman. And I am even more certain that there are those who will tell me that it is shameful for me to be proud of being British. "How can you be proud of a country that attacks the Muslim nations and kills innocent Muslims," they will reproach me ardently.
The following I say to all of you. All human societies have their strengths as well as their failings, whether they be Muslim societies or otherwise. It is my duty as a British citizen, and it is my responsibility as a Muslim woman to try and make the place I live in a better place. If I can practice my faith as I have understood it, if I can contribute to society and try to improve it, if I can express myself in that society so that I can be who I am and pursue my dreams, then that is a society that I can be proud of. My society may not be perfect, but I will support its aspiration to be a better place.
Labels: british, Muslim News, Muslim women, personal
24 Comments:
I love the idea of a Union Jack Hijab. If you can point out a place that sells them I'd buy you one even though I suspect we disagree about most things religious and political
Brilliant article Shelina- really worth reading.
Thanks Rumbold! Feel free to circulate it and spread the word... Glad you enjoyed it :-)
Dirty Dingus... if you send me a union jack, I will happily turn it into a hijab and use it at the appropriate time...
Dirty dingus, at least we agree on one thing, right? Connections can start in the smallest most unlikeliest of places...
Hi Shelina.
Another great article.
I have linked to you (hope you don't mind.)
Many regards
Graham (Harry's Place.)
All societies have their strengths and weakneses,but it seems strange that muslim nations all seem to be autocratic,mysoginistic hot beds of anti semetism and other forms of hatred!
Really interesting piece Shelina - slightly thrilling to see you bigging up Land of Hope and Glory!
I suspect the feeling of sticking two fingers up and then "blushing at the brazenness" is common to most Brits, not just the Muslim women. I'm white, male, anglo-saxon and still get embarrassed whenever I'm vaguely rebellious. Perhaps, with me, it's an English thing ..
... on which point, one VERY minor grumble. Britain didn't win the world cup 40 years ago. England did. I know, I know - pathetic of me. ;-)
Graham, it's always a pleasure to have you swing by.
Strange not to see any comments from your compatriots though, I thought they would enjoy themselves seething over this one :-)
About the football, yes, oops, but I'm not the world's most committed football fan to say the least. Oh dear,is that heresy?
It's good to have you and your positive, witty voice around. You lift the spirits and remind me that for all its faults Britain can be a great place to live and be.
Thank you.
Peter.
And good to have you back Peter, it's been quiet without you
I hope you are not saying you represent muslim women because not ONCE have you hinted that some women are forced, oppressed and veiled. This piece is embarrassing in that it misses that in a bid to blather on about how wonderful YOU feel and how rotten the government is. Well, bravo. But so what? Noone ever argued that ALL muslim women are repressed by their faith or are in any way incapable of feeling the way you do, being British and achieving their potential. As someone (eg me) who wasnt born here but adopted British nationality I'll attest to that. At the same time you skip right over many issues and undermine all the values you espouse. Some here and certainly abroad are oppressed by Islamic values. The day i see a muslim woman here actually recognise and champion their sisters in religion will be the day I for one, and a few others, can take you more seriously. This is what i mean:
'Pink hijabs are a fashion possibility...'
Grow up.
I cant get excited about pink hijabs right now, they dont bother me. As a feminist who is well aware of the issues many women face in Afghanistan, Iran and historically what they have riled against and face TODAY, the fact that in any small way that same mysoginy occurs in this country in is grotesque. Sorry to burst your bubble but seeing women walk around in 2007 covered from head to toe isnt feminism, it isnt a welcome social fashion statement. Its either pure alienating theatre designed as a two fingered salute (to borrow from you) or as other feminist muslim writers have pointed out, oppression, a way to mask up the beatings.
"Poor, oppressed, miserable, battered Muslim women!" cry the media harpies.
Yes. There are some. And im glad that someone sonewhere is worrying about them.
Shelina said:
Strange not to see any comments from your compatriots though, I thought they would enjoy themselves seething over this one :-)
Oh do come over and have a look at the off-topic comments on the thread below my link to you.
Graham (Harry's Place.)
Sometimes its nice to not have to talk politics. And this is from someone who is studying a Political Science degree! This article is great because it reveals that there are a lot of free, happy, pink hijab wearing Muslim women just as there are a lot of free, happy, pink boob tube wearing Muslim women. We have to constantly spend time defending ourselves, defending others and being demanded to save others. Just as the average Briton or Westerner can't do heaps to 'save' the Muslim women of the world, neither can we. We get into trouble either way, if we wear the Shemagh we are evil pro-Palestinian anti-Semetics, if non-Muslims were the Shemagh they are cool fashion- conscious people. You don't have to give us permission to be frivolous and we're not asking for it! We're not trying to save the world, but we will help ourselves, our families and our communities. Don't assume we don't care and don't demand we care in a way that you would understand!
Equally dont childishly write off people who do care enough to highlight those muslim women - the ones who dont get to choose to wear pink hijabs. Dont presume that because you are a muslim, other people dont get a say, dont understand or are in some way too stupid. We all live on this one isle, so we all get a say.
You ask not to be patronised and here you are doing precisely that.
Gushing on about freedoms, Islam, being British is all very well if you at least acknowledge a few painful truths for the women who suffer under Islamic values and about the ones who use their religion as a political badge to puncture community relations.
If anything your comment undermines the post. One second we are all British, next we are all communities merely brushing up along side each other who can neither have a say in or comment on 'community' issues.
It's not about how you cant win for trying either. As if that problem affects only *muslim* women!
I think you raise some important points. There is no belittling of the gravity of the issues facing Muslim women around the world. If you read my other posts you will see that the reality of the lives of Muslim women is far from the rosy picture that Muslims like to portray. That is not the point I am addressing here.
The rose-tinted view that Muslims often have about the social reality of Muslim women's lives is mirrored by the reverse view that those who are not Muslim have about Muslim women, saying we are all misled, backward, barbaric incapable of having an opinion. In a lighthearted way I am addressing this specific point.
Nobody is suggesting that this article addresses the totality of Muslim women's experience. No article on its own could ever do that.
Nobody is suggesting that only Muslim women can have opinions about Muslim women. It is ludicrous that someone can only have opinions of only what they have full and direct experience of.
You seem also to have missed a further point of the article - to address discussions in the Muslim community that participating in society is something irrelevant. This is a real issue in the Muslim community, but it needs to be handled without accusation but rather with positive example and by creating connections between our value systems. Perhaps you should explore this angle of debate further - connection rather than clash, if you wish to create change.
Yelling at people doesn't create solutions. Offering different options and engaging in dialogue does.
I can't save the world in an article of 1500 words. What I can do is try to open some hearts to hearing what Muslim women have to say.
The last comment was directed more at the other commenter than yourself in respect of who can and cant say what.
I guess i was going on Sunnys intro - which seemed to suggest that people couldnt accept some muslim women can embrace religion gladly and be British - or find life fulfilling as both. I cant say I have ever ever thought that. That cannot be stressed enough. Just as you think people have a myopic view of muslim women the same is true in reverse?
But neither have I have ever been irritated that the MSM have raised some very important issues. Finally. For years the MSM have ignored this, focusing instead on trivial issues or trying to portray feminism/rights as something it isnt.. a trivial, self obsessed navel gazing lipstick and handbags sort of thing. Now they seem to be tackling some key issues.
I was harsh I admit, but i was very surprised you didnt pick up on any of this aspect and instead uniquely saw the media as having done some major disservice. Since the post was presented as it was, it was disappointing to read such enthusiasm about what people can achieve, and not factor in something that is an issue. So often you only ever here these issues dismissed or written off purely as 'choice'.
I found myself nodding along in agreement with your post and hoping you'd tackle it in some small way. I haven't seen it tackled anywhere else yet.
I better understand your position. I look forward to reading what you have to say. Id be so glad to see the issues re-colonised and shaped by blogs, especially by articulate women such as yourself.
Thanks for the comment and good luck
i heard you on the (BBC AN) radio show this morning and i thought i'd leave a comment here. you came across very well spoken and composed and spoke out quite honestly, leaving a positive impression on all who heard you, i'm sure.
while i too recognise the muslim community is far from issue and opression free, i appreciate the tone your article is written in.
yep, there are plenty more practising muslim women who are proud to be brit born :)
Graham
For some reason I didn't spot your comment (apologies). Now i can't find the thread you were referring to where the (intriguing?) discussion may be taking place. Let me know how/when/what...
hi my name is sarah, islam is really interesting...
Sarah, peace! Welcome to spirit21 - I"m sure the readers along with me will try to offer more interesting insights...
hi its sarah again, do you have an emial address shelina in which i could share my thoughts with you about islam, sorry iv not been on here for a long time
Hi sarah
send me a comment with your email address in it - I won't publish it. I'll then send you an email
thanks
shelina
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